Gems from Fourth Grade

Looking back, I'm pretty sure 4th grade was the beginning of my awesomeness. I have a notebook full of stuff I drew/wrote then, and I feel like sharing some stuff with you. I was, of course, an amateur awesome person back then, so don't judge. Don't steal anything or I'll personally come to your house and assault you with weapons made of salt (just for the lolz).
Here's something resembling a poem:

Hello! My name is Fred
because I'm dead
in the head.
When I slept in my bed,
a guy named Ned
came out and said,
"I am Ned
of the kingdom of Bedhead.
I live under your bed
and my city is all dead."
I said, "I don't care about your dead
city under my bed.
I'll move the bed,
and light on your city will shed."
Ned said, "No! I'll get rid of my dead
city under your bed!"
So I picked up Ned and threw him off the roof.

Here's a list of the stuff I'd need for a school trip:

Camera
Portable CD player
Handheld hangman
Brain
Self
Hair
Clothes
Life
Air
Shoes
*Several lines of scribbles. One looks like it used to say baloney.*
Espanol Chicken identity

Later on, using the journal in 6th grade...

Here's some kind of song that my friend and I wrote:

A rug
A rug
A rug
It's on
A TV
And I can see
A flea
Lalalalalalalalala
It's looking straight at me
And I think
That it
Will kill me in my sleep
So I get
My light saber out
And try to hit it
But I miss
Every time
So I try
To eat it
But it tastes
So crappin' bad
That I spit
It out
TheeeeeeeeeEEeeeEE end.

And then there's a picture of a terrifying person that my cousin drew with swirly glasses and earrings that says "I don't like pickled mayonnaise! Or mayonnaised pickles."

And here's the last one. I wrote it on the band bus because I was bored.

I met a guy named Nat.
He told me I was fat.
I met a man named Larry
Who said my face was hairy.
I was feeling rather sad,
Till I saw a guy named Tad.
He said that I looked bad.
Then he called his friend Willy,
Who said that I looked silly.
And then I said, "Oh really?
I'll call my best friend Billy."
Well, to call Billy sure was silly,
Since he said my dress was too frilly.
Then I saw a dude named Paul.
He suggested that I crawl
Into a hole in the wall.
Well, I turned to Mr. Moore
When I met him in the store.
He turned and said, "Whoa Nelly!
Your feet are really smelly."
Okay, I get it.
I'm beautiful.
Now shut up.

The end.
-Xenon