Firstly, practice was later in the day than normal. This gave me more time to eat dinner/chocolate before practice with no regard to its effect on my speed. It was also at a different pool, which has a low ceiling, peeling paint, high windows, and (here's the important part) only four lanes as opposed to the normal eight. Basically, we were all crammed into this pool (which was, by the way, really shallow) in a room that looked like a horror movie set. You could see the potential murderers just waiting to come in and kill us all and then swim in our blood while we screamed for mercy and then died before anyone heard up because, as far as I could tell, there was no one else nearby. If you scare easily, I'm sorry for that description. Moving on. Secondly, our entire practice was freestyle, which is easy but also causes me to slow the practice down because I'm not exactly the best freestyler. I decided I could live with the shame of being lapped repeatedly because maybe I'd get faster as a result. But then I remembered the wound on my leg (long story involving skates attempting to chew my foot off at the ankle), which the water decided to attack violently every time I kicked. This was frustrating, since the wound doesn't even hurt anymore and isn't big enough to complain about anymore. Not wanting to mess up my leg and possibly give it foot plague after working for so long to fix it, I decided to kick with one leg instead. I ended up looking something like a handicapped fish. Who never had any swimming lessons. And also other fish keep hitting it because it can't find the center of the lane to use as a guide. I kept having to cut off the end of the set so that I wouldn't make the practice take forever. Of course, this wasn't helped by my goggles continuously fogging up and filling with water, causing me to lose visibility so I couldn't stay out of people's way when they passed me again. The people passing me chose to alert me by slapping me and swimming uncomfortably close to my leg, which caused me to become angry. The only outlet for my rage at the other swimmers was to scream dramatically every time my face was underwater. And every time I tried to breathe, someone would be passing me and would kick water in my face. I ended the practice feeling somewhat unhappy about my performance and the involuntary behavior of the other people, but I decided that freestyle is indeed my worst stroke and I could kill them all doing back or breaststroke.
I COULD KILL THEM ALL.
*creepy grin*
For those of you who didn't read the whole thing, here. I drew a handy picture to summarize this story:
And for those of you who were too lazy to pay attention to the picture, I made you another picture and advise you to find a brain somewhere:
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Eybdoog
-Xenon
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